Strengthens relationships: 5 hard therapeutic truths for couples

We will certainly tell you nothing new if we say now:Are hard work and injuries are part of and every now and then! Partnerships are always based on compromises between two individuals and for harmony you have to bite into the sour apple every now and then. So don't be angry with us if we nowFive tough truthscall one onebalanced and happy relationshipturn off. Get involved and grow - for your partner and for yourself.

Diefive truthsOf course, don't come from us, we let professionals speak. Reveal hereTherapists, which is an important thing about every coupleThe reality in a partnershipwant to give along.

Claudia BrinkmannWorks as a systemic coachin with her customers in the areas of couple and separation advice, personality development and with the "inner child". For them areAppreciation, recognition andEssential for a happy and stable relationship. Even small gestures can show the partner how much they appreciate him or she and strengthen their self -esteem. According to Brinkmann, this includes, for example, honest compliments or the recognition of the things that the other person does for the*the partner and the relationship. It is always important to actively express appreciation - even with apparently self -evident things - because that has a very positive effect. If this recognition is missing, an important stabilizing factor in the relationship is lost. In such cases, criticism and negative feedback often take over, which increases their effects. This can steer a partnership in a destructive direction and, in the worst case, lead to separation.

Diploma psychologistU.works as a systemic psychotherapist and author. Your truth for couples: even in happy relationships it can happen,That thetemporarily losing. You then live more side by side, are annoyed faster and long for freedom. Such ambivalent feelings are normal, especially after the first phase of love. Is that a danger to the relationship? Not necessarily! It is important to deal with the situation calmly and carefully. That means: Accept that love is taking a little break, do not over -dramatize your own feelings and still treat the partner with affection. Because loving behavior is also possible without strong emotions - and that is exactly what can make the decisive difference. If the other person feels loved, he or she often reacts as well - and swaps, love returns faster than you would have expected.

In partnerships we often look eitherSomething that we have been missing so far, orSomething that has always been familiar to us. Sometimes we also hope to have one through the relationshipbetter version of ourselvesto find. Often we are unconsciously drawn to people who touch a deep longing in us - a longing that reveals what expectations and wishes we have for our partner. But true happiness requires conscious effort and active design. Every relationship keeps us a mirror and confronts us with our own history. It offers the chance to get to know ourselves better. Ultimately, we not only fall in love with the other, but also to the opportunity to develop us further and to write a new story for our own life. The systemic therapist gives this truthMaria NeophytouCouples on the way.

The graduate psychologist, behavioral therapist and systemic family therapistRainer Grunertadvises: partnerships areoften shaped by unfulfilled illusions- For example, hope for eternal, romantic love. Media and art strengthen these ideas, and we project our longings onto the partner. Everyone lives in their own reality and misses the few real moments in the here and now. True closeness arises whenwe can loosen from our childhood wishesAnd do not expect the loved one to give us inner peace or prevent loneliness. A relationship only begins when we let go of our illusions. Then we can experience love at the moment - free of expectations, just being in being. The biggest gift in a partnership is to really see and accept each other.

In relationshipsthere are no good or bad, guilty or innocent, warnsDorothea Behrmann, Systemic couple and family therapist, shape therapist and author from Hamburg. There is happiness and misfortune, healthy and unhealthy love as well as relationships that strengthen us or harm us. Especially after oneWe often look for one or a guilty - either in ourselves or in the other person. But we remain unintentionally connected by allegations and resentors and cannot find a real conclusion. Letting go, when we look at ourselves and the other. By recognizing our responsibility and gratefully looking back at the good of the time together, we can say internally: You have a good place in my heart.