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Why paying children to study or do housework is counterproductive.
What works at work has no place in education.
To really motivate our children, we occasionally offer them money as a reward. Not a good idea, education experts know.
As parents, we do everything we can to encourage the best in our children. We are their biggest supporters and are not afraid to spur and encourage them when they lack the necessary drive.
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But sometimes we overstep the mark. For example, when we offer our children financial incentives to encourage them to help around the house. Or when the poorly said class test turns out to be a solid B and we hand our offspring a note for it.
At first glance, money may seem like a good motivator to persuade the child to do unloved work or to study, but it is always the worst alternative to have a lasting effect.
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Money as a motivator does not belong in education
Children rarely feel like studying for school or helping their parents at home. In order to motivate them, we quickly pull out our wallets and offer them the prospect of financial benefits. With a reward in front of them, most children really work hard and are super motivated.
For the moment, exactly the effect we wanted. The child does something for school or does the dishes. However, as you already guessed, this motivation phase doesn't last long. Because it is 'imposed' on a child from outside. If you do xy, you will get xy from me. Psychologists also speak of extrinsic motivators.
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This can ultimately lead to a child only doing tasks if it is worthwhile or if they receive a reward for it. It makes itself and its actions dependent on the outside.
Actually exactly the opposite of what we parents wanted to achieve with the extra financial injection.
How do you properly motivate children?
In order to convince children that learning is necessary to do well in school or that housework is simply part of life, parents do not have to forego rewards in their upbringing. But instead of offering children money as a form of recognition, we should praise them, thank them for their help, and let them know that we value their work. It sounds very simple, but very few people actually do it.
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Much more important than the result, whether it's a test at school or an unloaded dishwasher, is the work the child has put in. The path that has brought it to this point is therefore what is worth highlighting.
This ensures that the intrinsic motivation, i.e. that which comes solely from the child, grows. And this in turn ensures that the child relies on his actions and abilities and does not become dependent on others.
This creates the best conditions for raising an independent and independent person who has also learned to trust in themselves and their abilities.
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