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Are children of strict parents better brought up?
Education is an individual thing. Therefore, other rules apply in every family. What some already find strict is a matter of course for others. So when as a parents are you strict and do you have to be strict at all?
How strict must parents be? We clarify why the consequence of education is important and how you set limits with clear rules and love.
Education is more than just set up rules. It is about creating trust, clarity and a safe framework in which children can grow freely and informally. What some find strictly can be the basis for good development for others.
But how much strict is actually necessary to learn to take responsibility and to deal with respect? Do you have to take up as a parents every now and then so that children become empathetic and responsible adults from children?
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Rather, strict is consequence
Being strict is not necessarily about how many rules you have put up. Rather, it is about these rules.
Because family rules have the purpose that the family can live well together. That everyone treats each other respectfully and that nobody feels over or disregarded. So being strict means being consistent.
We parents have the task of ensuring that our children move within the rules applicable to us as a family. And if you don't, we have to be 'strict'.
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Maybe I can illustrate this from an example. I recently agreed with my daughter that she should come home at 6.30 p.m.
So that we have enough time to eat together and your time remains to watch a episode of your favorite series before going to bed. If it comes too late, the agreement was, your series would have to be.
It came as it had to come. Instead of being at home at 6.30 p.m., my daughter came home at 7.15 p.m. Therefore, there was only dinner and the series failed, as previously announced. This caused a lot of tears and doors bang with her.
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And honestly, I didn't feel particularly comfortable with the situation. I don't want to be the reason for tears and disappointment with my children. And yet I have remained strict, or better consistent to stay true to myself and to stay credible for my daughter.
Clear rules and clear consequences create understanding
If I had given in and let my child watch TV, I would convey to him that my rule is not so important. That it makes no difference whether it comes home at the agreed time or not.
That what I said before was just talk but had no consequences. I would simply make myself unbelievable and with all my rules. Because if nothing 'happens' if it is acted against agreements anyway, why only make agreements?
At the moment when you enforce the consequence of a 'misconduct', this seems very hard. Above all, because children react very emotionally when something is forbidden or taken away from them.
Even if you knew beforehand what would happen if you are getting home too late. Nevertheless, you should remain steadfast. This helps the child to accept rules in the long term.
Those who are strict must remain fair
And speaking of consequences: They should never have an indiscriminately on the child, but always be in connection with the misstep, or, even better, are already known beforehand.
Strict can sometimes be helpful to set clear rules and limits, but it is important that these borders are fair and consistent. However, if strictness turns into hardness or inimitableity, this can rather burden the child or lead to conflicts.
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Strict but loving
Despite all the strictness that you use with your or his children, you should always let the offspring know that you love him. My daughter will probably never fall into my arms if she missed her favorite show because of the delay. And she won't be hugged by me either. However, she should know that I love her no less because she made a mistake. And also that she can always come to me when she needs help.
Important note at the end:The information and tips in this article are only suggestions. Every child is different and reacts in its own way. It is therefore important that you go into your child and find out which way is the best for you.
