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This way you avoid yelling and arguments in the family.
Even the most nervous parents sometimes lose their composure and become loud. You can read here why parents should apologize quickly if they have yelled at their child and how to prevent such outbursts.
It feels absolutely miserable to have yelled at your child. The guilty conscience and shame that overtakes you after the outburst of anger are almost unbearable. After all, as an adult you should know better.
And that's exactly why you want to undo the situation. Since that's not possible, and what's said remains what's said, you have to find other ways to explain to your child what was going on with mom or dad. And ideally as quickly as possible.
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1. Apologize
Apology must therefore come first. We often say very unpleasant and sometimes mean things when we lose control and become loud. That means we should apologize for what we said. And we should also apologize for how we said it.
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2. Explain what you want
Once tempers have calmed down on both sides, you should explain to your child what you wanted. Of course in a calm and relaxed tone.
And while you're at it, you can also explain why you just lost your temper. It's often a lot of little things that make the camel's back overflow, and not just one situation. This helps you to reflect and helps the child to understand to a certain extent what just happened.
This will help you avoid future yelling
When parents and children live together, there are always situations that are inevitable for conflict. No matter whether it's tidying up the room, helping out around the house or dawdling in the morning, every family has its sore points. And they're probably not a secret to anyone here. So just talk about it!
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feelings
Children know very well what anger feels like. In fact, they are even masters at expressing their feelings. What they often still lack is an understanding of how some feelings arise. That's why it can't hurt to explain why you're currently or recently freaking out and how the feeling came about.
Compromises
Try to talk openly about what brings you to the edge of an outburst of anger, what you would like so that it happens less or, better yet, not at all, and then look for compromises together that are okay for the child and parents. This way you can prevent upcoming conflicts.
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Changes
You can also call a small family council at the end of each week and look together at how everything went in the past week, where there are still problems and what should be changed better. You can also talk about what’s coming up for everyone in the following days. In this way, potential stressful situations in which we all often react more irritably can be identified directly.
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