Everyone knows it and everyone hates it: you're telling a story, doing your own story and then you're unpleasantly interrupted. Not cool at all. This can happen quickly in the heat of the moment, but it shouldn't become a habit. Because: It's pretty annoying. Do you already have a candidate in mind who keeps talking to you? Then just read through this guide for good conversations before your next meeting. It shouldhelp you make yourself heard more when you're always being interrupted– and also make sure that you don’t start it yourself.
Good conversations: Why it feels so stupid when you're interrupted
If you actually wanted to say something, but the person you're talking to gets in the way and cuts you off just to say something yourself, that's not only disrespectful, but also really unsexy. Of course, in a quick battle of words it can happen that people interrupt each other. And you might not even notice it. That's okay. But if this happens more often, it gives the person concerned an uneasy feeling. On the one hand, it is suggested to her that her opinion is not that important (for the other person). Cutting others off is a classic, unhealthy act. This move devalues and disrespects the person being interrupted. On the other hand, it says a lot about the character of the individual who always interrupts others, whether consciously or unconsciously. Either the person simply cannot listen well, has a strong need to communicate, or simply considers their own opinion to be more important than that of others. In any way: uncool number. That's not how you have a good conversation. But you can do something about it.
Why people interrupt others in conversations
There are a variety of reasons why people keep interrupting you in the middle of a sentence. It could be a lack of manners because people simply haven't learned to let others make excuses. These can be conscious power games and demonstrations in order to clearly define the role relationship (especially in a professional context). It can be a matter of profile neuroses and a desire for recognition. The desire to block counterarguments as early as possible in a discussion. Or just some form of, when it's men who constantly interrupt women (that's what it's called, by the wayManterrupting, occurs more often). You should definitely defend yourself against this. Otherwise it won't be a good conversation.
What you can do if you are always interrupted – 5 tips
Let's assume you are in the role of the victim, are constantly interrupted and hardly have a say in the conversation. On the one hand, you should generally think about whether the person is good for you. On the other hand, you should at least give her the chance to correct her mistakes. Often you still have to stay in contact with this person. That's why we've put together a few tips that you can follow to make your voice heard more:
Keep talking
One option if you're always interrupted in a conversation is to just keep talking. Then you and your conversation partner talk at the same time. But one party will eventually stop speaking. And hopefully that's not you. Hopefully this will make the other person realize the mistake they just made by interrupting. Raising your voice slightly is allowed, but you are not allowed to become aggressive. Because then the supposedly good conversation quickly degeneratesout of.
Point out errors
The most obvious but also most valuable tip to avoid interruptions in conversations is to point out your mistake to the other person. And immediately. These can be simple hints (“Hey, you just interrupted me”) or clear instructions (“Please let me finish for a moment”). In any case, you should tell the person directly that you are dissatisfied with this behavior and will not tolerate further interruptions.
Articulate feelings
Part of pointing out the wrongdoing includes making it clear to the other person how you feel when you're always being interrupted. Please don't fight fire with fire. That's ok. To do this, make it clear what emotions are going through your head at such a moment, e.g. E.g.: “I feel disrespected.”
introduce rules
Make it clear that you don't want to be constantly interrupted. And also make it clear what you need in the future to have good conversations. For example, the rule that the other person must actively pay attention to letting you finish. Especially in argumentative situations, it is so important to listen carefully to each other and not interrupt each other. Set this rule together if it doesn't work otherwise.
Get to the point
You can always work on yourself a little. Doesn't mean you deserve it if people always interrupt you in conversations. But you should still make sure to formulate your concerns clearly and get to the point, especially in a professional context. Anyone who tells stories in a long, rambling and incoherent manner is much more likely to be interrupted. That's still not legitimate, but you have our other four tips for that.
How to have good conversations without interrupting others
Do you feel like you're more prone to interrupting people but just can't do anything about it? Then you have come to the right place. And yet, you can do something about it. Simply take a step back and let the other person finish speaking in peace. As I said, a quick exchange of blows is okay, but one or two sentences get lost, fair enough. But if you're always talking over other people, that's not cool at all. Wait for the person to finish your sentence. Respect when the other person isn't finished and continue to listen. If you accidentally step in, say: "Sorry, finish the story first, I interrupted you." It's not that difficult to show decency. And you benefit from that too. At least with a good conversation.