Are we good parents if other people find our child stressful? We say yes, for the following reasons.
How do you know that, despite the self-doubt that regularly plagues us parents and the rolling eyes that our children give us, you are on the right path to being a good parent and good parents?
Probably first and foremost to our children. After all, they are our combined upbringing. We have done everything in recent years to ensure that they can go through life carefree, freely and with a great deal of self-confidence. We tried to make it clear to them that they are the creators of their own happiness, that they sometimes have to work harder to achieve their goals and that they should always be themselves.
And that's what they are today. And that's exactly what can offend other people. For example, they find it stressful or even cheeky when a child is strong-willed or confidently expresses his or her opinion. These people then label our children too boldly, too know-it-alls and too directly. And are annoyed by them. But not us parents. We see that we can't have done much wrong in raising children if the children know what they want and how they can get it.
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Children of good parents demand that their opinions be respected
Good parents want their child to think independently. They take their child’s wishes and needs seriously. Instead of building pressure or threatening punishment, good parents are able to compromise with their child. This almost automatically leads to a good and respectful relationship.
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If our children learn from us what it means to respect another person and their, sometimes completely different, opinion, this will help them later in life to be able to deal with many different people. At the same time, these children demand that they be treated with the same respect. That you listen to them, listen to them and show them understanding. And this can be difficult, especially for adults, and can lead to a lack of understanding. They quickly describe children as stressful.
Children of good parents take themselves seriously
Children of good parents know that it is not only important to be there for each other, but just as important to take care of themselves. Taking time for yourself is important as a parent and also as a child and is not at all selfish. Because time for yourself makes you happy. Being able to pursue your own hobbies and desires makes you happy.
Those who know their own worth are much more likely to know how to respect and recognize others.
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Children of good parents demand trust
Children of good parents are more or less aware of the trust they enjoy. They know that they don't have to be perfect and that mistakes are a part of life. And that gives them the opportunity to make their own decisions confidently and, at some point, to confidently demand their own decisions.
Good parents then let go at the crucial points and hope that their child makes the right decision. Or help him if it was the wrong one. Good parents trust their child and their child trusts them.
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Children of good parents rely on their parents' love
Love for the child is not a means of pressure for good parents. It will not be renounced if it acts differently than its parents wish. Good parents therefore do not attach any conditions to their love. They let their child know that the way they are is perfect and loved.
And that just makes children confident, independent and strong-willed and not, as others might perceive it, stressful.
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Children of good parents can feel everything
Good parents set a good example and can convey to their children what is bothering them, stressing them, making them sad or simply putting them in a bad mood. In no way are they coddling their children, but they are teaching them that showing your feelings is never a weakness.
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Not even if other people can't handle this openness. Being able to express what we are feeling helps us parents cope and others understand us. This also applies to our children. Learning about your own feelings ultimately helps you to be able to react empathetically to other people.
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Important note at the end:The information and tips in this article are suggestions only. Every child is different and reacts in their own way. It is therefore important that you listen to your child and find out which path is best for you.
