Understanding children: We give you a small translation aid (what you really mean)

What children say vs. what they mean. Sometimes you just don't understand your own offspring. We give you a small translation aid.

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Children don't always talk the way they grown. Often they say something, but mean something else. They don't want to manipulate you. They don't test you or are cheeky and defiant.

No. Children cannot always express exactly what they really mean with their words. Among other things, this is due to the fact that you cannot yet express your feelings with your words.

Therefore, it is worth listening to and behind the words to discover your actual need. There are often other meanings behind many children's statements.

We will give you a small translation aid so that you may be able to understand your children better in the future.

"I wasn't."

You have heard this sentence from your children one time or another. Even if the little ones have been alone in the room and have fallen or broken, they claim stiffly and firmly: "I wasn't."

It is usually immediately clear to you as a parent. But what does the offspring mean? In most cases, the child does not want to tell a lie directly with this sentence. Rather, it is afraid of the consequences and feels caught. By telling this "lie", the little ones look for a way to protect themselves so as not to get into difficulties.

Therefore, do not react with allegations and scold with your children, but rather reacts better so that the little ones can trust you.

"I don't like you anymore."

A classic when it comes to the fact that mom and dad have just banned anything. Often the sentences can be even worse. "I don't like you anymore" is probably the most harmless version.

Such sentences in extreme rage situations are usually pronounced by the offspring. At such a moment, the child feels total injustice and is angry with the "no". However, it can only express its feelings by saying something like that. For the moment, the little ones will probably not really like you because it feels powerless, frustrated and not understood. But actually mom and dad are always the best (exceptions confirm the rule).

"I can do that alone."

Even if my son can't really speak. He clearly shows me that he wants to do something alone. On the one hand, it is of course proud of me, on the other hand, this phase is an extreme test of patience. Everything takes longer, often something goes wrong - but if the children want to be independent at some point, you have to go through this phase as a parent.

With this sentence, the children express that they want to create something themselves. You want to prove something to yourself and be happy when the parents give you your trust and just let you do it. Even if the little ones know that it takes longer and, as a result, is not always perfect. Therefore, we should take the “everything alone” phase of our offspring seriously and promote them. No matter how much patience we have to raise.

"I can't do that."

If your child says that it cannot do something, it usually has nothing to do with the fact that it really can't do this. Rather, this sentence appears more if the offspring do not want to do something itself or if something is more difficult than expected.

They often give up quickly or don't try it at all. That has nothing to do with the real skill. Motivate your children at least in such situations to try it. Give help and support them. It usually works anyway. The joy that you did it is the best motivation to try again next time.

"I am hungry and want to eat something."

If children say that they still want to eat something, it is synonymous with "I would like to have something sweet to eat". Because the sentence is often said after lunch or dinner if the children should actually be full. But we know ourselves: something sweet is (almost) always.

"I'm ready to clean up."

"I'm ready to clean up." If your child says that, you should take a look into the children's room again as a precaution. Often the room looks absolutely not tidy. At least not as you expect or want it.

And that's the point too. Says your child that it has tidy, it has it too. However, only as the child perceives it even sufficient. And then the standards differ: parents want everything to be in place. Cleanliness simply looks different for the offspring. Nevertheless, the child finds it tidy.

In such a case, you should still praise your child. Because that's exactly what it wants. In his eyes it did the task properly. So there should be praise. You can then clean up the rest.

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