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First in the video: This is how much money parents spend on Christmas presents on average
There is almost nothing better than fulfilling children's greatest wishes at Christmas. However, you shouldn't work through the entire wish list. The expert reveals why fewer gifts are often more.
At Christmas it is probably the most beautiful moment when the children, fidgety with excitement, stand in front of the living room door, it slowly opens, the first notes of “O Tannenbaum” sound and you can witness how the little ones are almost floating with happiness.
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After all the waiting, curiosity and tension, it is finally here - the day on which the children's greatest wishes will be fulfilled. A mountain of presents looms under the festively decorated Christmas tree, all just waiting to be unwrapped.
However, this mountain of gifts is problematic.
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Children want to feel valued
“If there is an imbalance between the emotional needs [of the child] on the one hand and a number of gifts on the other, the first thing that occurs is material satisfaction, which is constantly increasing and will continue to increase inexorably,” explains Armin Krenz, science lecturer for elementary education and developmental psychology, in an interview with the 'Huffington Post.'
Krenz says that children need one thing above all: love and attention from their parents. Children want to feel valued for their own sake. However, an “overwhelm” of gifts can put this appreciation, which is so important to them, in a false light. This can result in children only feeling valued when they get something they want.
Gifts lose their appeal
So when parents read their child's every wish and fulfill it, whether for Christmas, on birthdays or just in between, they are only serving the child's "material satisfaction", as Kranz puts it. But the desire for love, attention and care falls by the wayside.
Gifts lose their appeal and become uninteresting. The child feels joy in the gift, but only for a brief moment. It quickly becomes boring and the desire for something new arises.
Children should learn that you can't have everything you want. You can wish for anything, without question. But they have to learn to understand that not everything they put on paper on their wish list will be under the tree.
Even though this can be disappointing, it also ensures that the Christmas magic is not lost. The anticipation and waiting are even better when you don't know what you're going to get as a gift.
Stop giving gifts out of pangs of conscience!
And yes, as parents, giving gifts is also a conflict of conscience. Sometimes you have the feeling that you don't have enough time for your children and that you should at least give them a little joy with this and that. But that is exactly the wrong approach. Because children want to spend time with mom and dad - and not just with things that mom and dad gave them as gifts.
So, dear fellow parents: keep the shopping lists shorter, fulfill a big wish for your children, make them and you shine and just enjoy the holidays. Because the most important and beautiful thing about Christmas is still the time with the family.
Speaking of family: To avoid a flood of gifts from grandmas, grandpas, uncles and aunts, it helps to give them precise instructions. Either in the form of a specific gift note or with a limit of one gift per child.
