Ending a relationship: These 5 signs make it clear

Many would say a relationship is over when there is little or no sex. When love has taken on very friendly to platonic characteristics. Then it would be time to call it quits.

But that's not necessarily the case. Many relationships in which passion has given way to real, deep feelings for each other after a few years of living together are absolutely great and a win for both parties.

It's about other things that show that a relationship is no longer really what it should be: loving interaction with each other and a give and take that doesn't demand but gratefully accepts.

Therefore: Here are5 things that mean it's time to break up– and it’s not a lack of sex!

You used to spend every free minute together. Today you notice that you are more happy when he or she doesn't have time for you, or - if you live together - you are happy when you come home and realize that he or she is not there. Even though each of us needs freedom, if the feeling of wanting to be alone prevails in a relationship, then something is wrong.

A yardstick is the following: Think about the last time you were happy to see him or her and did something together. If that was a long time ago and you hardly ever do anything together that deserves the name “date,” then that doesn’t really speak for a relationship in which both partners make an effort for each other.

Of course, after several years of being in a relationship, you no longer have to pull ten legs out like you did at the beginning. But not doing anything together that you enjoy together is not a good sign and can indicate a separation.

But before you can answer the question “Should I break up?”, there are a few other things you should consider.

It's the principle of false necks. No matter what your partner says: you interpret it negatively. There is hardly a topic where you don't clash directly or feel attacked. Like a minefield, your relationship life has become a constant battle.

You constantly misunderstand each other and there are certain topics where you don't really listen to each other anymore because you're already on the edge of your seat again.

Unfortunately, as harsh as it sounds, this is a pretty clear sign that it's time to break up. Because let's be honest: If you always assume the worst about your partner, you don't really feel loved, do you?

Of course there are sensitive topics in every relationship where everyone has their own opinion. But that's not the point. It's about a fundamentally negative attitude towards your partner, which manifests itself in many small arguments.

Arguments are important in a relationship. So it's not that you have it, but that you know how to lead it. Magic word: culture of debate.

This means, among other things: No arguments in front of others. No manslaughter arguments. Listen to each other and let each other finish. This is important between lovers because it shows respect for each other.

However, if you notice that everything that was once taboo has long since crept in and that you now have quite harsh manners, then question that. Respect is essential in a partnership. And this ability is most evident where it is most difficult, namely in arguments.

Anyone who can remain tolerant and fair even though they could burst with anger fights properly. Anyone who is increasingly at each other's throats with their partner, even though things used to be different, should consider breaking up sooner.

When talking about your relationship, you often find yourself talking badly about your partner. And then you start to justify yourself and then have the bad feeling that you have betrayed him or her to some extent.

This is also a warning signal that you should take seriously. Because if something bothers you about your boyfriend or girlfriend, you can tell them, the only question is: why? If you want something to change, talk to him or her about it, not your friends.

It's always ok to get advice, but let's be honest: When I talk badly about my partner, I'm not really looking for advice, I'm just venting my anger. Looking for a solution to the problem looks different.

As I said: lack of sex in a relationship doesn't have to mean that you have to break up (there are always phases that are wilder and those where both are stressed and their heads are somewhere else). But this is only correct if there are enough other physicalities in the relationship.

Sex isn't just penetration and everything else is boring. Sex also begins when your partner looks at you when you are standing naked in the bathroom and you notice that he or she finds you really hot. When he or she strokes the back of your neck because the other person missed you being close. If he or she kisses you deeply, just like that. All of this is also a promise that the person you are talking to will find you physically attractive. And it also shows a loving relationship. Physicality is super important for a relationship.

If the sex act itself goes through phases of drought or gets stuck in a routine - there is something you can do about it. But if you live next to each other without feeling the need for physical closeness (of any kind), then you should think about whether it wouldn't be better if you were friends instead of a couple.